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"The first thing I do in the morning is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue." -
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Top 5 quotes from Dorothy Parker
"The best way to keep children home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant -- and let the air out of the tires."
"Four be the things I'd have been better without: love, curiosity, freckles and doubt."
"This is not a novel to be tossed aside lightly. It should be thrown with great force."
"If all the girls who attended the Yale prom were laid end to end, I wouldn't be a bit surprised."
"This wasn't just plain terrible, this was fancy terrible. This was terrible with raisins in it."
Top 5 quotes from Miscellaneous
"Sex and creativity are often seen by dictators as subversive activities."
"Everything in the world may be endured except continued prosperity."
"Man has almost constant occasion for the help of his brethren, and it is in vain for him to expect it from their benevolence only."
"Every individual...generally, indeed, neither intends to promote the public interest, nor knows how much he is promoting it. By preferring the support of domestic to that of foreign industry he intends only his own security; and by directing that industry in such a manner as its produce may be of the greatest value, he intends only his own gain, and he is in this, as in many other cases, led by an invisible hand to promote an end which was no part of his intention."
"My second favorite household chore is ironing. My first being hitting my head on the top bunk bed until I faint."
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