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"Traffic is like a bad dog. It isn't important to look both ways when crossing the street. It's more important to not show fear." -
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Top 5 quotes from P.J. O'Rourke
"A very quiet and tasteful way to be famous is to have a famous relation. Then you can not only be nothing, you can do nothing, too."
"A hat should be taken off when you greet a lady and left off for the rest of your life. Nothing looks more stupid than a hat."
"A little government and a little luck are necessary in life, but only a fool trusts either of them."
"There is a remarkable breakdown of taste and intelligence at Christmas time. Mature, responsible grown men wear neckties made of holly leaves and drink alcoholic beverages with raw egg yolks and cottage cheese in them."
Top 5 quotes from Miscellaneous
"Sex and creativity are often seen by dictators as subversive activities."
"Everything in the world may be endured except continued prosperity."
"Man has almost constant occasion for the help of his brethren, and it is in vain for him to expect it from their benevolence only."
"Every individual...generally, indeed, neither intends to promote the public interest, nor knows how much he is promoting it. By preferring the support of domestic to that of foreign industry he intends only his own security; and by directing that industry in such a manner as its produce may be of the greatest value, he intends only his own gain, and he is in this, as in many other cases, led by an invisible hand to promote an end which was no part of his intention."
"My second favorite household chore is ironing. My first being hitting my head on the top bunk bed until I faint."
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