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"Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap on-a-rope."
Bill Cosby
"If the new American father feels bewildered and even defeated, let him take comfort from the fact that whatever he does in any fathering situation has a fifty percent chance of being right."
Bill Cosby
"Parents are not interested in justice, they're interested in peace and quiet."
Bill Cosby
"If you cannot get rid of the family skeleton. You may as well make it dance."
George Bernard Shaw
"I wanted to do something nice so I bought my mother-in-law a chair. Now they won't let me plug it in."
Henny Youngman
"No government can love a child, and no policy can substitute for a family's care."
Hillary Clinton
"Nobody has ever before asked the nuclear family to live all by itself in a box the way we do. With no relatives, no support, we've put it in an impossible situation."
Margaret Mead
"When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years."
Mark Twain
"A very quiet and tasteful way to be famous is to have a famous relation. Then you can not only be nothing, you can do nothing, too."
P.J. O'Rourke
"Men are what their mothers made them."
Ralph Waldo Emerson
"The family you come from isn't as important as the family you're going to have."
Ring Lardner
"The one thing I want to leave my children is an honorable name."
Theodore Roosevelt
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Bill Cosby
George Bernard Shaw
Henny Youngman
Hillary Clinton
Margaret Mead
Mark Twain
P.J. O'Rourke
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Ring Lardner
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