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Quote Author Rating Rate
"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch." Jack Nicholson 4.83333333333333 avg (0 votes) Rate this Quote
"Never interrupt me when I'm trying to interrupt you." Winston Churchill 4.95 avg (0 votes) Rate this Quote
"Nothing is wrong with Southern California that a rise in the ocean level wouldn't cure." Kenneth Millar 4.16666666666667 avg (0 votes) Rate this Quote
"She was what we used to call a suicide blond - dyed by her own hand." Saul Bellow 3 avg (0 votes) Rate this Quote
"Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go." Oscar Wilde 4.53125 avg (0 votes) Rate this Quote
"Some folks look at me and see a certain swagger, which in Texas is called 'walking.'" George W. Bush 3.08163265306122 avg (0 votes) Rate this Quote
"Suppose you were an idiot...and suppose you were a member of Congress...but I repeat myself." Mark Twain 4.52631578947368 avg (0 votes) Rate this Quote
"That woman speaks eighteen languages and she can't say 'no' in any one of them." Dorothy Parker 4.61538461538461 avg (0 votes) Rate this Quote
"The difference between Los Angeles and yogurt is that yogurt comes with less fruit." Rush Limbaugh 3.38888888888889 avg (0 votes) Rate this Quote
"The music business is a cruel and shallow money trench, a long plastic hallway where thieves and pimps run free, and good men die like dogs. There's also a negative side." Hunter S. Thompson 4.42647058823529 avg (0 votes) Rate this Quote
"The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans are suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they're okay, then it's you." Rita Mae Brown 4.625 avg (0 votes) Rate this Quote
"The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. This wasn't for any religious reasons. They couldn't find three wise men and a virgin." Jay Leno 4.71428571428571 avg (0 votes) Rate this Quote
"The taxpayers are sending congressmen on expensive trips abroad. It might be worth it except they keep coming back." Will Rogers 4.875 avg (0 votes) Rate this Quote
"There are two kinds of egotists: Those who admit it, and the rest of us." Laurence Peter 4 avg (0 votes) Rate this Quote
"This report, by its very length, defends itself against the risk of being read." Winston Churchill 4.76923076923077 avg (0 votes) Rate this Quote
"Thus far, the reputed idiot Bush has graduated from Yale and Harvard, made a stack of cash in the oil industry, become the first consecutive-term governor of Texas, defeated a dual-term VP for the presidency, and led his party to [November 5th's] extraordinary triumphs. Let his opponents keep calling him stupid; if they do, within five years Bush will be King of England, the Pope, and world Formula One motor racing champion." Tim Blair 3.5 avg (0 votes) Rate this Quote
"Washington is a Hollywood for ugly people. Hollywood is a Washington for the simpleminded." John McCain 3.91666666666667 avg (0 votes) Rate this Quote
"Which painting in the National Gallery would I save if there was a fire? The one nearest the door of course." George Bernard Shaw 4 avg (0 votes) Rate this Quote
"You may have genius. The contrary is, of course, probable." Oliver Wendell Holmes 4.8 avg (0 votes) Rate this Quote


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Browse Clever Jabs quotes by Author:
Abraham Lincoln Adlai Stevenson Arnold Schwarzenegger
Bill Maher Dan Quayle Dorothy Parker
Dwight Eisenhower Fran Lebowitz Fred Allen
George Bernard Shaw George Eliot George W. Bush
Groucho Marx Henry Ford Henry Kissinger
Hunter S. Thompson Jack Nicholson Jay Leno
John McCain Kenneth Millar Laurence Peter
M. Grundler Marcel Proust Margaret Thatcher
Mark Twain Muhammad Ali Oliver Wendell Holmes
Oscar Levant Oscar Wilde Rita Mae Brown
Robin Williams Ronald Reagan Rush Limbaugh
Saul Bellow Tim Blair Walter Matthau
Will Rogers William F. Buckley William Shakespeare
Winston Churchill  

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