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Quote DB :: Comedy :: Clever Jabs Search in this category Sponsored Links Quote Author Rating Rate "Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable that we have to alter it every six months." Oscar Wilde "I once said cynically of a politician, 'He'll doublecross that bridge when he comes to it.'" Oscar Levant "Imagination is a quality given a man to compensate him for what he is not, and a sense of humor was provided to console him for what he is." Oscar Wilde "As a woman, I find it very embarrassing to be in a meeting and realize I'm the only one in the room with balls." Rita Mae Brown "The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans are suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they're okay, then it's you." Rita Mae Brown "Cocaine is God's way of telling someone that they're too rich." Robin Williams "I had a dream the other night. I dreamed that Jimmy Carter came to me and asked why I wanted his job. I told him I didn't want his job. I want to be President." Ronald Reagan "The difference between Los Angeles and yogurt is that yogurt comes with less fruit." Rush Limbaugh "She was what we used to call a suicide blond - dyed by her own hand." Saul Bellow "Thus far, the reputed idiot Bush has graduated from Yale and Harvard, made a stack of cash in the oil industry, become the first consecutive-term governor of Texas, defeated a dual-term VP for the presidency, and led his party to [November 5th's] extraordinary triumphs. Let his opponents keep calling him stupid; if they do, within five years Bush will be King of England, the Pope, and world Formula One motor racing champion." Tim Blair "I'm number 10 at the box office. Right under Barbra Streisand. Can you imagine being under Barbra Streisand? Get me a bag. I may throw up." Walter Matthau "The taxpayers are sending congressmen on expensive trips abroad. It might be worth it except they keep coming back." Will Rogers "I dote on his very absence." William Shakespeare "I would like to take you seriously, but to do so would affront your intelligence." William F. Buckley "He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire." Winston Churchill "Never interrupt me when I'm trying to interrupt you." Winston Churchill "I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly." Winston Churchill "He is a very modest man with a great deal to be modest about." Winston Churchill "This report, by its very length, defends itself against the risk of being read." Winston Churchill << Previous 1 2 3 Browse Clever Jabs quotes by Author: Abraham Lincoln Adlai Stevenson Arnold Schwarzenegger Bill Maher Dan Quayle Dorothy Parker Dwight Eisenhower Fran Lebowitz Fred Allen George Bernard Shaw George Eliot George W. Bush Groucho Marx Henry Ford Henry Kissinger Hunter S. Thompson Jack Nicholson Jay Leno John McCain Kenneth Millar Laurence Peter M. Grundler Marcel Proust Margaret Thatcher Mark Twain Muhammad Ali Oliver Wendell Holmes Oscar Levant Oscar Wilde Rita Mae Brown Robin Williams Ronald Reagan Rush Limbaugh Saul Bellow Tim Blair Walter Matthau Will Rogers William F. Buckley William Shakespeare Winston Churchill

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